What is Happening? Planning What?

Oh well.. It is all about dieting and exercising right to get a healthy body and live healthy.

Yes, I am on that process right now. Planning on how to eat right and exercise. There are a lots of reasons that can be given why I choose to diet (again and again and again). But this time (maybe) it is different. Well, I usually stick with my crash diet where I used starving, cut my foods, skip my meal and so on that not good for my body. I am not gonna lie that I was able to lose my weight until even I do not believe that I was able to lose until that much. I lost from 64 kg to 56 kg total of 8 kg in 2-3 months. But I am not happy about it because people used to say that I look slim but it just cannot be seen thoroughly even with my own eyes. It might be because of my body shape that does not change that much. There is a possibility that I lose my muscle more instead of fats.

Than, I gained back to 64kg in zaaaasss (it is means fast), in 1-2 months. What have I eat during this period? I eat white rice, I eat buffet which contain more fats and fats and fats and carbs rather than protein, and I eat ice creams, I eat miserably. Lots of fried foods have been served during those period. One of the reason is because our food mostly are fried and oily food. If I don’t eat it, I need to spend lots of money to buy all those fibers food. I need to save my money 😦 .

Of course I am frustrated with my body recently. I am tired of this starvation, ups and downs of my weight, my chubby face, lost of confidence. “I give up”, that was I said. Than I was just keep on eating the way I want to. eat this, eat that, eat fast food. But I’m not lying too, when I eat that sometimes, I feel guilty. “what if I become fat like before? 73kg?” and other so much ‘What if” questions are playing in my mind.

So, I’ve been thinking what am I supposed to do with this? I need to change. I don’t want to waste my youth like this. Later, I volunteered in body measurement for my ex-roommate’s Final Year Project (FYP). They took my body measurement and count fats and muscle weight and also estimate age of our body. Well, the result shows that my body age average is 34 and fats in my visceral is quite high (as expected). That was a time where I do feel some motivation go through my mind. I NEED TO CHANGE!

Fortunately for me, I found one video that is truly giving me a big motivation. Which her story was same what I had gone through before this. When my appearance is showing that I am looking much older than I am. Some people even thought that I already have 2-3 kids. Am I look that old? Am I looking like a mother of 2-3 kids? Hey, it was hurtful.  If she is just 19 when people said that to her, I was just 15 when I received the same words. But she changed it fast, while I just delaying it for a time. Hahaha!

But, I really want to share her video here which has become my motivation and keep my determination on! Here you go~

Oh, by the way I also have uploaded some of my video diary of my diet. Not that much but enough to make sure I keep myself on tract.

Will write more soon! Bye from now,folks! 😀



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